![149e9a.jpg](https://www.steemimg.com/images/2016/08/19/149e9a.jpg) Loneliness can be both pleasant and painfully disgusting. On the one hand, you want to get more your own space to hide away and relax, but on the other hand, you need warmth and communication. And here is the question: what kind of relax and what kind of communication we want to achieve? Standards and requirements are elsewhere in the world we live in. It is hard to be an individual person, but it is more difficult to understand the individuality of others. You have to cover our soul from the world because your uselessness cause pain and weakness. Dull melancholy proves inability to meet the soul mate. Disappointment after the next encounter with someone else’s selfishness makes you to lose your heart. Injustice and indifference can justify laziness. A pity to yourself and to your inner world brings warmth and pleasant tortures. That is the way to wrap into the old and soft blanked and cry on yourself. But what next? ![27c41a.jpg](https://www.steemimg.com/images/2016/08/19/27c41a.jpg) You can feel sorry for a long time, at least for the end of your life. «Loneliness» sounds proudly and become a usual habit. It does not matter how many people around you – they all are far away and not for the long time in your life. On the whole, you are satisfied. However, looking at stars in the sky you understand that you need something and that wakes your melancholy again. You are asking yourself: why do I need to born in this world, where there is no heart to speak with? What are love and relations? Thus, we run away pretending we are busy or philosophize at our kitchen how difficult our life is. The truth is that we remain alone.

Obviously, loneliness ends at the same point where it starts – in your brain.

You want others to recognize and respect your undeniable uniqueness, appreciate your achievements, like all things you demonstrate and produce. Do you have many such people, sincere fans of your cult of personality? By the way, about fans. Actually, stars are suffering from loneliness too, as their fans see only themselves in the image of celebrity and nobody cares about the person. Loneliness and privacy are different states of the mind. Loneliness is connected with the lack of attention to the person. No matter where the person is and with whom, he or she denies to perceive the environment, if it is not in line with his or her own standards and rules. All things around are not enough to feel happy. Privacy, in its turn, is the state when the person is one on one with him- or herself in a silence, sharing own revelations with God. Nevertheless, in this state person is not separated from the world, but perceives it as it is. You can go on philosophize, add some descriptions of a nature, quotes from wise aphorisms and your favorite poems. ![3500ae.jpg](https://www.steemimg.com/images/2016/08/19/3500ae.jpg)

But if you want to say goodbye to your loneliness – it is time for self-therapy:

1. Enhance your loneliness and delve into your feelings:

watch any murderous melodrama and cry if you can;
sing a song in karaoke about something sad and eternal;
look in the eyes of your reflection (5 min minimum).

Your task here is to discover yourself and find your individual qualities, which you hide from others by justifying your loneliness.

2. Restore your lost charisma:

make a list of your talents, which includes both existing and hypothetical;
make a list of wishes, which apply only to you;
find something interesting or original in your appearance;
visit shops and think about clothes and footwear you would really like to wear;
throw away all ordinary things from your wardrobe, left only ones which emphasize your individuality;
find time for creation, choose something for self-expression;
smile with your unrepeatable smile;

The task here is to remember yourself, understand your difference from others and find out why you have come into this world.

3. Give away and thank:

feed, treat your guests, friends, relatives, passers, cats, dogs and birds;
donate some money to the charity;
thank people, it will help you to better understand the person or situation;
make gifts, especially for yourself;
give detailed compliments, admire the appearance and qualities of other people;
start agricultural or floricultural activity.

You goal at this stage is free yourself from your internal greed, deficient limitations and hostility.

4. Be active:

go in for sports, make your body fit;
buy a pass into the swimming pool, fitness club, dance or yoga studio;
regularly work on your body with no excuses;
eat healthy and natural food, limit the consumption of alcohol;
attend a seminar on self-development, an exhibition, festival – feel the atmosphere of activity, even if you do not participate in it;
buy and master any musical instrument, music discharges stagnant energy in you and around you, and that is a good way to demonstrate your talents to people around you, your guests and neighbors.

This is necessary to charge yourself and begin to like yourself physically. Active people light others with vitality and magnetism.

5. Communicate with positive people:

art studio, poetry lovers club, sculpting section – join the people that share your interests; you will find topics to discuss and what to do;
exclude contacts with unhappy people – problems happen, but there are people that enjoy that;
learn foreign languages and communicate with foreigners – you can look on the life under the different angle and with another mentality you will be able to extend frames of your perception;
do not limit your communication in the Internet only with dating sites, create your own blog, read and comment other users, share your photos and thoughts – people like to unite on the grounds of common ideas;
flirt, it is not call to have sex with everyone, it is an interesting game of self-expression;
pray – communication with God is the most positive.

You should stop stagnating and aging by yourself. There are many interesting things in the life and you can dedicate your time to them. Understand others and you can discover new communication that may be useful. It is time to get out of your cave. Loneliness is not a sentence but always a choice. I wish you warmth and joy! Image Credit: Oleg Borodin Follow me: @mama-steem #writing #psychology #philosophy