I was never into the idea of having children. Too many things I wanted to do, too many humans already destroying this beautiful planet. A confrontable bummer with my partners if they had ideas about that.
A few events blew in the sail of change. I met the most amazing woman of my life on a free party in the South of Spain. I left my country and went together with her on a wild adventure driving an old 7-ton army truck from Belgium to India.
Most psychological schools say that the choice of a partner has a lot to do with seeing him/her as a good mother/father. My partner was a child therapist and a total anarchist, I felt really confident talking about anything.
I had lots of questions on the topic of children. How can you raise children freely in this ever-imposing society? What defines the generation we desperately need to change the current state of affairs? What values to give?
Very difficult questions… Most beautiful answers… I was ready…
The universe has always listened to my intentions. Never before was I ready. My previous girl-friend lied to me about anti-conception for five years but didn’t get pregnant, phew. She got pregnant soon after we split up, i surely was the one unable to make children.
Here comes the beautiful part. It was in Dubai, Middle East, middle of our way to India. I declared my readiness. My girlfriend had a coil as anti-conception. We decided to remove the coil. Dubai was a bit more medically advanced then India, better to do it there.
Making love with nature’s intention of what love-making is all about, has something out-of-this-world, very powerful. And powerful it was, she got pregnant on that very first night, tell me about the power of intentions!
Our 1st child was born 3 months after we arrived in India on off the Southern beaches of hippie Goa in a place called Agonda. She was given the name of Ula, meaning “Jewel of the Ocean”.
Three years later, in the Himalaya mountains of India, our 2nd child was born. We had an 86-year old local midwife assisting us. She is a story on herself, did more than a 1000 births, knew how to turn our baby by hand etc. It was the last birth she ever assisted and died soon after, another treasure of information lost.
There are different regulations for determining the citizenship of a child. Some countries have “Citizenship by birth”, others have “Citizenship by descent”. India has both and doesn’t allow dual citizenship. We decided to register them with the Belgian Embassy and they both have Belgian passports. The chance of getting stuck on borders, e.g. Pakistan, with Indian passports was too high and Belgium is very relaxed on the schooling level. They have a “learning obligation”, not a “schooling obligation”.
India is such that you could bribe around to get a second certificate with a different name and give your children a second passport from a different country, i.c. India or their mother’s country. The though played in my mind, it would have been a nice present to my children but I didn’t do it, just sharing some ideas…
When children are really small, the only thing you need is time, love and devotion. For them, there is no difference between an old 1967 truck or a king’s palace. We travelled with them to the most beautiful jungles and beaches of India, a beautiful connected experience.
We have been very aware of the ongoing process of our children. Evolving with them, my girlfriend did a kindergarten project in Goa and later a toddler school in Gokarna. Our children developed freely in a safe environment always surrounded by nature.
Children grow fast and our truck soon became too small to host a family of 4 with 2 dogs.
We moved to Karuna Farm, a paradise in the mountains of South-India, on top of the list of the most biodiverse places on Earth. We made ourselves a beautiful cozy home and planned to homeschool our children.
That sounded all wonderful but we had many issues. We raised our children in English but it was not our mother language. After a year or so, the reading/writing progress of our oldest child was very low, a lot of doubts arised whether we were actually capable of getting them to read and write in English.
Being a parent takes up all your time and energy. Nothing wrong with that. I think time and energy are the most valuable things you can give to someone.
Maybe teaching was just too much for us. I could not devote myself full-time. I didn’t like the different kind of parent-child interaction. Homeschooling would take away much of my other parenting role which I valued more. Maybe teaching was just not our thing…
Once again, the universe answered. The most amazing school was a 90 minute astonishing forest walk away from our house. A school based on J Krishnamurti’s principles, http://www.sholaicloaat.org
Krishnamurti stresses values of awareness and nature-bound education. Environmental Studies, Social Studies, Wood work, Mechanics, Gardening, Music, what an amazing topics they had. Math’s and English were also on the program as they were connected to Cambridge in England.
The teachers were mostly very young dynamic super enthusiastic people from Bangalore, the most funky city from India where the green movement Is very big. The classes were small. The school had 2 big holidays in summer and winter which would allow us to make some amazing travels.
The decision was made. Our children were very happy to leave the mountain top and step into this new adventure. Our intention was to pick up homeschooling again as soon as they would master the basics of reading and writing.
Our children joined school after the age of 7. The school was actually a boarding school, they were the only day-schoolers. We started with 3 days a week which soon became 4 upon their own requests. The school has been a very positive experience for our children.
Now our children want to widen their horizon by being more free to move out in the world by themselves. They want more things to do. They want to have neighbors with children to invite over. They want a different experience.
We take it as a compliment for us as parents. The final goal of parenting is to have independent young adults. Very often you see children taking the opposite direction of their parents. That exploring part is what makes man’s evolution.
It is not easy for us to leave the paradise we have found but we will. We will start exploring South Europe next summer. We will do it all over again. Get a new house on wheels and find the next paradise.
Life is change by definition. If you want to live your life, change has to be a part of it.
I am 2 months on Steemit now. I have encountered many passionate, similar-minded brothers and sisters from all over the world and I expect to meet many more. A social platform was never my thing but the universe (read: @eco-alex) clearly presented me Steemit and I do wonder where it will lead to. I am putting my intentions out for the following:
If you live in a nice place in South Europe where nature is not absent and were our children might find what they are looking for, please let us know. We would love to check it out on our coming South-Europe trip.
Maybe you are interested in an off-grid nature experience? We have a most beautiful house in a most beautiful environment with some very beautiful people. What about a house swap?
Take care,
Love
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