In these times when people have been isolated for a time, one of the kindest things you could do is to hold space for them and listen.
In doing that you can benefit too!
You may find you come away knowing them better. People can reveal a lot about themselves so if you want to understand them, know their motives, dreams and desires, then listen more closely.
The ability to listen attentively is not a skill set held by everyone but is often listed as a desired skill set.
In listening to a person you can gain insights like:
• Learning their expectations for themselves and if they have them for you
• It can help build better relationships with friends & family and also coworkers
• Helps in being able to resolve issues quicker
• You can get a better understanding of what people are trying to tell you
• And will know how to respond properly
• It builds trust
Some barriers you may encounter on becoming good at listener is things like:
• Prejudice
• Language and accent barriers
• Noise levels
• Fear
• Anger
• Worry
• Poor attention span
• Hearing issues
Work to over come these knowing that some of these barriers may prevent even the best listener from fully understanding, like if someone is not speaking their native language. They may use the correct words, but there may be a handicap with their accent and the way they pronounce words making it had to understand.
If you are having a hard time understanding someone still remain listening and try some of these things which may improve your comprehension.
• Move in a little closer
• Maintain eye contact
• Nod and smile to indicate that you are listening
• Ask appropriate questions
• Try to clarify the issue in your own words
Even if you still can't comprehend at least the person speaking will feel you are doing your best to understand them and this can put them at ease which can help them to better be able to explain their situation.
When the opportunity arises to express kindness to others step up and do so!
If the desire is there to be kind start by knowing what kindness is. Kindness can mean different things to different people. Here's a definition that works well for me, found on a Google search for the meaning:
Being kind - the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.
And may I add to that : Be genuinely kind!
Spewing out compliments doesn't cut it if they are false compliments. When you don’t mean what you say, that isn’t a compliment at all and could end up hurting someone - better to say nothing than to give false compliments.
The old "golden rule" -
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Is actually a real good way if you are looking for direction on how to be kind.
And drop that negative attitude. Being positive is far more likely to put you in a space which makes being kind much easier to accomplish.
Try walking a mile in someone else’s shoes. This gives you an opportunity to see life from someone else’s perspective and you can more easily empathize with them.
Kindness only really counts when you express it. So set your mindset to ‘Kind’ and you’ll notice all sorts of opportunities throughout your day to reach out and be kind to someone which in turn can bring feelings of happiness and trigger some endorphins in you (so the scientists say!)
While we are on the subject of kindness remember to be kind to yourself!
Take note of that voice in your head (the self talk)and if need be change the script to kindness. Build some little acts of self-care into your day.
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