It's been around 4-5 days I have been staying in Poland, trying to figure things out. My mind is still not in shape, I am confused and I can't think properly nowadays. Because of so much confusion and sudden changes, I feel devastated and I am completely blank.
My journey from Kharkiv, Ukraine to Warsaw Poland was not so easy. Although, many people, my relatives, and friends flooded my social media asking why I was still in Kharkiv, why I hadn't left my house to be safe. It's very easy to discuss or to explain to someone but I bet many of them had no idea what I was going through. Even my dad also lost faith in me at some point. I am really grateful to this hive community, some Hive people are so special and I guess my thanks are not enough for them. Not only did they worry about me or tried to stay connected to me always, but also they tried every possible way to rescue me from Kharkiv. Should I mention their name? Later... That will be another story...
4th March:
After considering a lot of pros and cons, I had decided that I can't live in the city anymore. Kharkiv is the second-largest city of Ukraine which is located northeastern part of the country. The Russian border is very close to my place which was 41km away, basically the border of Belgorod city, Russia. So, to make a journey from northeast to the west was not so easy. And in this war condition, the entire journey was impossible. I also waited for my embassy team or red-cross team for the rescue process but there was nothing. The Northeast part of Ukraine stayed abandoned for a while until now during this war situation and evacuation was almost impossible until you catch the train of your own if you are lucky. On the other hand, half of the city was already destroyed at that moment, a lot of civilians got killed, schools, residential buildings were under attack; so I finally decided to start my journey to the west, Lviv no matter what...
It was 4th March, early morning, the sun was about to rise and the curfew was about to finish. Around 6.00 am, I have ordered a taxi to VOKZAL (railway station) but the taxi came so late. During war situations, it's not so easy to get a taxi and the price of the taxi was very high (still very expensive). From Kharkiv to Lviv, the evacuation train was the only available transportation (only women, children, and old people allowed). So, around 7.00 pm I went to the railway station with Gigi and I was shocked.
There were thousands of people trying to enter the station (basically entrance) and the platform was far away from the entrance. It was overcrowded and huge noise and rush. People were pulling each other, pushing each other just to enter the station. I was so nervous because I have never seen such a crowd in my life. Somehow I have managed to reach the entrance of the station but the security guard, volunteers didn't let me in. They said, your dog is not allowed on the train and you have to leave your dog here. On the other hand, Gigi was so afraid that she started jumping around. I was holding her in one hand and the other hand was holding my bag. Well, I said I can't leave my dog here but they said, no matter what, your dog is not allowed on the train, go alone to the platform by leaving your dog or go home with your dog.
I started crying a lot and the whole people were starring at me, I only remember one thing, I just said, if I go, I will take my dog with me otherwise no...
Another fact, because of so many phone calls, my phone battery died and I lost all the connection with the world. No internet, no phone. I asked a lot of people to help me somehow charge my phone but nobody cared even I saw some foreigners around me, when I asked them for help, they just said, leave your fucking dog here. Your life is more important. After hearing such negativity and seeing such a station environment, I decided to go back home.
Well, there was no taxi available at the station who was ready to take me home. Most of the drivers were saying, oh you have a dog, we can't let you in our car, bla bla. After spending 5 hours at the station, I returned home like a failure.
After reaching home, I have found a number of a volunteer so I decided to connect with her. I told her my situation and she promised me that she will help me to get out of Kharkiv with my dog. Without her help, I wouldn't be able to make it to Poland today, even I will never ever take my dog with me on this journey.
5th March:
The night of 4th March was scary, an air attack happened but I was determined. I rearranged my backpack and decided to keep it low weight so that I can easily jump onto the train. I also charged my phone so that I don't lose any connection and also kept in contact with the volunteer as well.
5th March, 4.30 am. I woke up early, prepared myself for the hard and rushed, uncertain travel destination knowing that anything can happen anytime. I have never been to another city of Kharkiv so I had no idea what I was doing. At 5.45 am, the volunteer came to pick me and my dog up and she took us to the railway station. The station was empty, not many people were not there so she showed me a place and told me to stay there until she comes back.
We waited for an hour and finally, she came back and took us to the platform. Meanwhile, I was looking at the station and was trying to say goodbye... I was sad, upset but also wanted to find a safe place for my dog and for myself. I had enough devastating nightmares and life when I was in Kharkiv...
Finally, the train arrived and the volunteer helped me and Gigi to get on the train. The last word she said, goodbye and I will be waiting for you. I cried hard, trust me I cried seeing my city for the last time and was dishearted leaving the city.
Finally, the train had started moving, way to Lviv...
To be continued...
All the photos used are owned by the author, they were taken on march 5th, 2022.