Welcome to my seemingly endless journey.
A trip that will take you to places I might have visited many moons ago.
It´s a tale that came back to me when I meditated on one of my past lives. A life I told you about in my unbelievable true story.
As promised in that story I will now share this story with you.
Chapter 12
Those last words of the master.....
My only clue is the man with the gold flower and black..., what is it? A black sphere, a ball, or rather a black pearl?
When we still lived by the sea, fishermen sometimes found shells with pearls, in an exceptional case they found a black variant.
A golden flower with black pearl, even if it wasn't, that description felt right.
Could those diabolical figures from my dream be the same men spoken of by my fellow villagers? That almost didn't work.
They told me about friendly strangers. Men who paid for the help received with beautiful objects, those men bear no resemblance to the bloodthirsty monsters from my dream.
I was left with little else than that symbol and those travelers who once passed through the area here traveled south. Those men would know more about that ruler of the world if there was any. Finding them might help me get some perspective on this growing mystery.
It might even shed some light on what happened to the village of my dream. Or at least hear stories of the slaughter, I could not imagine this was common practice in the outside world.
Surely there must be a reason, that dream, that meditation, the words of Oniko keep chasing me like shadows.
I am a blind man connecting the dots. I can´t make the connection there is this elusive thing that haunts my mind and cannot be captured in clear images or feelings.
With my good hand, I take the water jug and fill the pot, which hangs over the fire. I really could use some thé right now. Some peace and warmth on this turbulent day will do me good.
I free my feet from the leather sandals, throw them aside, and hear their wooden soles klank on the stones. This way my feet are in direct contact with the ground on which I live, it´s good to be grounded for a while.
It´s an ancient way to let the pressure, tension, fear, or pain slide into the earth through your feet. In this way, the mother can absorb the energy and clear it of all the dirty negative.
The extract of herbs does me great good, the warm glow goes through my body. I sniff the strong smell so deeply that I can see the roots and plants I used.
Sitting cross-legged at the low stone table, I light a new candle. I light some incense in the flame. Not only to clean my cabin of negative vibrations but mainly to relax my mind.
I need to find the strength within, my essence. So that I let myself be guided by my bigger self, bigger than my fear or my ego. Only he can make the right decision, without being misled by my human nature.
Sipping my thè I realize it can't be a coincidence. Too many things try to lead me in a new direction. All events in a considerably short time, they all provide new impulses, possibilities, and changes.
Then there is my sister in the crystal room, even she made me start a new phase in my life. That became increasingly clear to me since Numico talked about it. Numico also talked about that trip. In his strange form of wisdom, can he be right again?
Everything points to change.
Somebody has opened all the windows and doors of my life simultaneously and a fresh spring storm swept through my dusty life.
I have been stagnating for too long, something is going to give. With these thoughts, I put the mug to my mouth and drank the remaining liquid in one gulp. Then, louder than necessary, I put the mug back on the table.
I cut the cord, at least for myself. I will explore the map I created. I will search and find the answers to the questions and images that have plagued my mind for too long now.
I run my hand over my forehead and through my hair, take a deep breath, and gather the courage to get up. Courage was required, this will be my first step.
Then I look around for a moment, the stone hut, which had been my safe haven for so long, suddenly seemed very small. Nothing left to do here so I blow out the candle, and get up. This place will not disappear if I leave. She will be here to return to when I've found what I've been looking for or get tired of searching.
For the first time, it feels like I can separate myself from this place without it disappearing. She will continue her day-to-day business even without me. And should I ever return, I shall, perhaps with some effort, belong here again
I had chained myself to this place. But now, all of a sudden it seems so simple to break those shackles. Yes, the road will be full of obstacles, but it will show new beauty to my eyes and draw new ideas into my mind.
I couldn't stay here, this community was wonderful, but it didn't provide me with the answers I am looking for. It offered me no challenge, no fight.
It kept me in the chains that had been attached to my heart since my childhood. Chains that got entwined more and more with that heart.
If I didn't break free soon, we would become one. Locked up for a lifetime with the sadness, that this village reminds of.
Now how do I go about this?
This is unheard of, even absurd to some.
That I, the recluse, of all people venture into the world, without knowing where to go or what for. Not as a scout, not as a trader, not as an expedition. But as a loner, without a destination. But I believe beyond a doubt that the destination lies fixed in my destiny.
Just before I pass the threshold I realize something. It is not wise to inform anyone of my departure. The decision to go is only the first step and I may have taken it a bit hastily. That does not mean that my preparations also have to be done in that same manner.
By the way, it is also quite possible that I will revert my decision, that is much easier if no one knows about it.
Click The Next Button for The Next Chapter
