Explore everyday life in Japan
Of course there are exceptions to every rule and custom, but from the many conversations I have had and overheard while in Japan, and from a number of sources I have read over the past eight years, it seems to me that in many, if not most Japanese households, the women here are in complete control of family finances.
As a result, many Japanese men, or non-Japanese men like myself living in Japan, are either given what is called O-kozukai (monthly spending money), or they have to ask for money on a regular basis and explain how, when, where, and why they want to use it.
It’s not clear to me when and why this custom started, but I think it’s fair to say that it has its roots in the Japanese working culture, a culture which has given precedence to male employees over the years and which often puts strong demands on those employees to be away from their homes for most of the hours of the day and night and on many weekends as well.
A side effect of this male-dominated work culture is that Japanese women are generally pressured by societal expectations to either stay home and tend to the household once they have had children or, rather than pursue a career, work part-time while tending to household affairs. I would even say that this culture has led many women to, in contrast to current western ideals, aspire to “marrying well” and becoming what in Japanese is known as a Shufu—a housewife.
From what I have seen in my time here, gender roles in Japan are very much in place. Though Japan is a patriarchal society, when it comes to matters of the home, very often the women here are in charge.
I understand that it is difficult and maybe even impossible to make accurate and sweeping generalizations about any society, but, that said, I think it is fair to say that typically, and with plenty of exceptions, the women here are the ones who take care of the cooking, the cleaning, the raising of children, the communication that takes place with teachers, the research that goes into choosing tutoring schools and places for children to learn extra-curricular activities such as sports, music, and art, and, yes, matters of money too.
This is an ongoing series that will explore various aspects of daily life in Japan. My hope is that this series will not only reveal to its followers, image by image, what Japan looks like, but that it will also inform its followers about unique Japanese items and various cultural and societal practices. If you are interested in getting regular updates about life in Japan, please consider following me at @boxcarblue. If you have any questions about life in Japan, please don’t hesitate to ask. I will do my best to answer all of your questions.