As some of you may know, my wife and I have a small art gallery and gift shop, here in our town.
The shop is located in the heart of our historical downtown area; there are lots of other shops around. Although not as prevalent as it once was, there are also quite a few apartments in the 3-5 story buildings, above the shops.
A solitary seagull
One of the things I can't help but notice is the group of "regular visitors" we have.
They come into the gallery on almost a daily basis-- as best I can tell-- for their daily dose of social interaction. And they don't just come in to say "hello" and move along... sometimes they want to spend several hours engaging in conversation about very little.
The four that immediately come to mind all live alone; all live in low income housing (or "rooms"); none of them have cars; none have had any kind of job (that I know of) in at least the past five years.
Occasionally, one will ask to borrow ten dollars "till my check gets in." To their credit, every $10 loan I have made has been paid back. At least two have no discernible sources of income... but they are not homeless.
I wonder, at times, about their lives. I wonder how they got to where they are right now... and whether they are living as they do as a result of conscious choice, or circumstances beyond their control.
Yellow flowers in our garden
Although I am not a psychologist, I wouldn't characterize any of them as mentally ill. They are just "different," in certain ways... one of those "ways" being that they spend their days wandering from shop to shop, engaging shopkeepers in lengthy conversations. But they don't have any friends, by their own admissions...
When I look at their lives, I can't help but reflect on my own, and my persistent efforts to be as "outside the mainstream" as possible. I haven't had "a job" in close to 20 years; I don't even have "a profession" as a self-employed person... I just take whatever opportunities present themselves, and make the most of them while I can. When they have run their course, I figure something else out.
Makes me wonder if I really am really much more than "a few inches" from these regular visitors to my shop.
Desert flowers, California
During some of the more solitary parts of my life, I made little effort to make and maintain friendships, and managed to scrape by well enough to meet the rent and basic bills to keep a small apartment.
But I had no desire at all to interact with the world; I basically avoided all social contact-- where our "visitors" to the gallery seem to very routinely go out to get their fill; not from friendships, but from interacting with shopkeepers.
So I wonder if they are simply using this "arms length" form of interaction to get their social contact? Or are they genuinely lonely? Or do they have difficulty making friends through more conventional means? Or is the "issue" that shopkeepers represent a "captive audience" of sorts... where others might see them and head in a different direction? Who knows?
In case I am coming across as judgmental-- I am not. I am merely curious. I'm curious about these people because they in no way seem content or happy... they just seem to "exist," like they are going through the motions of life, with no particular intention. As they say, don't judge anyone unless you have walked a mile in their shoes... I'm just wandering what walk they may have taken.
What do YOU think?
(As always, all text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is original content, created expressly for Steemit)