Bibliophilia - Books by Wladimir Kaminer

First Exposure: Militärmusik

Have you ever come across a book you enjoyed so much that you felt like you couldn't get enough of it? For me, the clearest example of such a book was Militärmusik by Wladimir Kaminer. I remember being given this one to entertain me on a long train journey, and boy did it do it's job! I remember bursting out in uncontrollable fits of laughter, that people in the compartment must have gotten highly annoyed. But what could I do? Putting the book away was impossible. The only agreeable compromise would have been to read it aloud so my fellow travelers could partake of the fun, but they were less interested in it.

In this wonderful piece of humorous literature the author brings us close to the Soviet Union, where he grew up and enjoyed many colorful adventures of his youth. One of the earliest details relates how he kept getting in trouble with his teachers and his parents for making up weird stories that his friends found entertaining, although they drifted a bit away from the truth. In this light the rest of the book makes a lot of sense, and the reader won't be bothered with pesky facts. Instead, they will enjoy following his description of organizing heavy metal concerts in tiny soviet apartments (fill the place with people, play three songs, throw some coins in the bathtub, repeat), hitchhiking trains criss-crossing the Soviet Union while stealing smuggled goods, and doing military service with a kid from Afghanistan, bought by a Soviet family from across the border, to send into the service instead of their own son.

Quirky and absurd is an understatement, but the funniest part is the reasonable, good hearted, and slightly naive way he details all this weirdness. After I was finished with the book, and even got bored with re-reading the funniest parts, I knew I was hooked. I needed to get my hands on more books by Kaminer.

Hitting Close to Home: Schönhauser Allee

The second Kaminer I read was a bit different. In Schönhauser Allee he describes his new home by choice: Germany. Okay, to be precise, it is more Berlin than Germany, and for those who don't know, the difference is about the same as between New York and the US. The book has the same style as Militärmusik, short anecdotes about life, in a bit more "normal" part of the world.

True enough, the stories are less exuberant, though the same constant weirdness tends to run through the whole setting. At this point I was starting to wonder: is it really the author, or could it be the place he's writing about? I had always assumed his stories to be notoriously exaggerated. However, having lived in Berlin myself, I kinda knew, it couldn't be all his own BS. Vietnamese store owners who get by with a handful of words, Russians parties where people meet the ex of their ex, and classy socialist literature found in the dumpster. This was indeed the Berlin I was familiar with. And how well he managed to capture it!

A Culinary Travel Guide: Küche Totalitär

Have you ever read a recipe book? I mean read it, cover to cover? I know, what a question! Who ever would? Unless it was written by Wladimir Kaminer, of course, in which case we're back to cultural weirdness, this time with lots of gourmet treats of equally strange persuasions. The nice thing about this book is how he describes various regions of the former USSR, a typical dish from that region, and some weird story that happened to him, or someone he knew, in that part of the world (usually involving food). Potatoes fried with a vaseline-smeared iron? Or how about a cow's udder, cooked fast in it's own secretion (milk)? Since I generally don't say no to food, and I have yet to find a place that'd consider not worth traveling to, I highly enjoyed this book as well.

More Berlin and a Bit of the World: Russendisko, Ich Bin Kein Berliner, Meine Russischen Nachbarn

Only after the previously mentioned books did I turn to Kaminer's most famous debut, Russendisko. The title certainly did ring a bell: During my time in Berlin there used to be a place where Russian bands would perform the wildest party music ever! Later they came out with an equally rocking album, which seemingly every Berliner had in their music collection. What I didn't know was that who made it all happen was this same guy: Wladimir Kaminer. Though the music and the venue occupy a minor part of the book, which otherwise deals with life in the city and the weirdness of its occupants.

The same can be said about Meine Russischen Nachbarn, meaning My Russian Neighbors, which is also just one of the many topics touched in that book, as well as Ich Bin Kein Berliner, a type of alternative tourist guide for experiencing Berlin. By this time I was approaching the saturation point in Kaminer's literature, though the addict in me wanted to give it yet another few chances.

Getting Tired of Kaminer: Mein Deutsches Dschungelbuch, Die Reise Nach Trulala, Ich Mache Mir Sorgen Mama

Finally I got over my Kaminer trip. The tree books mentioned here were the last ones by him I read. To be completely honest, I'm even having a hard time remembering what they were about. Fact is, nothing out of the ordinary: short tales of strange folks in weird situations doing things that would seem highly unusual, but told in a way as if it was the most normal thing in life. Along the way we get to know his family, and he even ventures out of Berlin. But as for the last title mentioned, I have no idea what he might be worried about... Maybe this is also the reason why I reached the end of the Kaminer highway. There are other intriguing titles I haven't read, such as Es gab keinen Sex im Sozialismus, meaning There Was No Sex In Socialism. I'm sure, that MUST be an amazing read... still, up until now my curiosity hasn't been sufficient to actually look into a copy of it.

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If you are interested in reading these books, you can find them on my stortebeker channel at LBRY. If you are interested in joining LBRY, please follow my invite. You may also be interested in my other book reviews in my Bibliophilia series:

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